Parent's Training Manual for Altar Boys

Congratulations on your choice to let your son(s) serve at the Lord's Altar.

To become an altar boy, your son needs to be able to do the following:

Overview

 * Can fold hands together in the proper position
 * Can remain focused on the altar (can refrain from looking at Mommy, Daddy, or other people during Mass)
 * Enjoys serving
 * Can refrain from carrying on conversations with other servers during Mass (about video games, school, their friends, their pets, etc.)
 * Can focus on and pay attention to what is going on with the Order of the Mass
 * Can refrain from playing with their cinctures during Mass
 * Can refrain from using bad words, profanity, or obscene speech
 * Can refrain from participating in rowdy activities when vested (chasing other servers, jumping on other servers, etc.)
 * Can and will hang up their own vestments after Mass
 * Can vest themselves, including tying and untying their own cinctures
 * Can tie and untie their own shoes
 * Can be silent during Mass and speak only when necessary or when they are participating in the prayers or songs
 * Can refrain from regularly using the restroom during Mass (less than once a month for Sunday Masses and less than once a week for daily Masses); if they have a hard time with this, they can try not drinking much for two hours before Mass and make sure they get to the restroom before Mass
 * Can refrain from regularly falling asleep during Mass (less than once a month for Sunday Masses and less than once a week for daily Masses)
 * Can refrain from talking loudly or boisterously in the altar boy sacristy or in any other part of the building unless necessary
 * Can refrain from playing around with the books (skimming through the pages without intending to read anything, slamming the books shut, intentionally dropping them on the floor, etc.)
 * Can refrain from socializing with the girls 15 minutes before Mass, and can refrain from socializing with the girls after Mass while they are vested
 * Can refrain from socializing with each other after the Server's Prayer before Mass
 * Can maintain correct posture at all times during the Mass

Details
Can fold hands together in the proper position


 * Your son will need to hold his hands together in a reverent praying position for the majority of the Mass (approximately 45 minutes of a 60 minute Mass, of which an estimated 20 minutes is done while kneeling, 5 minutes while walking, and 20 minutes while standing).
 * Practice with your son in the pew: have him keep his hands folded while standing and kneeling for the Mass. He can rest his hands on his lap while he is sitting.

Can remain focused on the altar (can refrain from looking at Mommy, Daddy, or other people during Mass)


 * Your son will need to be able to practice self-restraint with his eyes, refraining from looking around at the congregation, at the people behind him, at the ushers during the collection, and at children who start crying or making noise.

Enjoys serving


 * If your son does not want to serve, DO NOT FORCE HIM!!! Do not pressure him or nag him or give him the guilt trip about it either. For your son to serve, he must want to do so of his own free will.
 * If your son does not enjoy serving, do not force him, pressure him, nag him, or give him the guilt trip about it. This usually signifies that he does not understand the Mass or that he needs further spiritual formation.

Can refrain from carrying on conversations with other servers during Mass (about video games, school, their friends, their pets, etc.)


 * Your son will need to be able to refrain from carrying on conversations with other altar boys during Mass, and refrain from partaking in them even if some of the other altar boys start them.

Can focus on and pay attention to what is going on with the Order of the Mass


 * Your son should know the basic structure of the Mass (Sign of the Cross, Penitential Rite, Gloria, First Reading, Responsorial Psalm, Second Reading, Alleluia, Gospel, Homily, Creed, Petitions, Offertory, Preface, Eucharistic Prayer, Our Father, Lamb of God, Communion, Prayer after Communion, Final Blessing), and be able to follow along.
 * Your son should become familiar with the organization of the missalettes (which can also be very helpful in teaching your son the parts of the Mass).

Can refrain from playing with their cinctures during Mass


 * Your son will need to be able to practice self-restraint with his fingers and refrain from playing with his cincture, hair, hood, or vestments.

Can refrain from using bad words, profanity, or obscene speech


 * Using bad words, profanity, and obscene speech is a violation of the Second Commandment. As parents, you cannot use this kind of language yourselves, and you cannot allow your son to use this kind of language.

Can refrain from participating in rowdy activities when vested (chasing other servers, jumping on other servers, etc.)


 * Your son will need to be able to practice self-restraint even when his friends are misbehaving. Talk with your son and determine ways that your son can avoid situations where his friends try to provoke him to misbehave.

Can and will hang up their own vestments after Mass


 * Have your son practice hanging up his own clothes at home. When he can do that well, have him practice putting one of the vestments in the altar boys' sacristy back on its hanger and hanging it up.

Can vest themselves, including tying and untying their own cinctures




 * Have your son practice putting his vestments on and taking them off in the altar boys' sacristy. Have him practice how to tie and untie his own cincture (just a plain double knot).

Can tie and untie their own shoes


 * Shoes frequently come untied during Mass, and your son could easily trip if it happens to him unless he knows how to retie it.

Can be silent during Mass and speak only when necessary or when they are participating in the prayers or songs


 * Your son will need to practice self-restraint with his mouth and refrain from speaking when unnecessary, making comments, asking irrelevant and unnecessary questions (“Why are Father's vestments green today,” etc.), or complaining during Mass. This can be left for before or after Mass.
 * Note: your son will on occasion need to speak with other servers or priests during Mass (if there is a change of plans, something breaks, someone gets sick, etc.)

Can refrain from regularly using the restroom during Mass (less than once a month for Sunday Masses and less than once a week for daily Masses); if they have a hard time with this, they can try not drinking much for two hours before Mass and make sure they get to the restroom before Mass


 * Practice with your son in the pew and ensure he can refrain from having to leave for the restroom during Mass. If he can do this when he is in the pew, he will be able to do this as an altar boy.

Can refrain from regularly falling asleep during Mass (less than once a month for Sunday Masses and less than once a week for daily Masses)


 * Practice with your son in the pew, and ensure he can remain awake by himself without you needing to intervene. If he can do this when he is in the pew, he will be able to do this as an altar boy.
 * Ensure your son gets adequate sleep before Mass, and possibly have him take a nap before Masses late in the day.

Can refrain from talking loudly or boisterously in the altar boy sacristy or in any other part of the building unless necessary


 * Practice with your son and make sure that when he is at home, in the store, or in church, he can control his tone of voice and realizes that he rarely needs to shout or talk loudly to be heard. If he can do it, he will be able to do it as an altar boy.

Can refrain from playing around with the books (skimming through the pages without intending to read anything, slamming the books shut, intentionally dropping them on the floor, etc.)


 * Practice with your son and ensure he can refrain from doing any of these things when he is by himself. If he can refrain from doing these things in the pew, he will be able to refrain from doing them as an altar boy.

Can refrain from socializing with the girls 15 minutes before Mass, and can refrain from socializing with the girls after Mass while they are vested


 * This is a rule primarily directed toward older altar boys.

Can refrain from socializing with each other after the Server's Prayer before Mass


 * After the prayer, we begin to quiet ourselves, thinking of the Mass and preparing for our conversation with the Lord.

Can maintain correct posture at all times during the Mass


 * Practice with your son and ensure he can stand, sit, and kneel reverently during the Mass, refraining from squirming, swaying, or complaining. If he can already reverently maintain the correct posture in the pew, he will be able to do it as an altar boy.

Glossary
(To view pictures for a glossary entry or to edit a glossary entry, click on its title to go to its page)


 * Altar


 * Alb


 * Ambo


 * Amice


 * Baptismal Font


 * Benediction


 * Boat


 * Biretta


 * Burse


 * Candelabra


 * Candlestick


 * Cassock


 * Chalice


 * Chalice Veil


 * Chasuble


 * Ciborium


 * Cincture


 * Communion Rail


 * Cope


 * Corporal


 * Crosier


 * Cruet


 * Exposition


 * Humeral Veil


 * Incense


 * Lectern


 * Lectionary


 * Luna


 * Mitre


 * Monstrance


 * Organ


 * Pall


 * Paten


 * Pew


 * Procession


 * Processional Candle


 * Processional Cross


 * Pulpit


 * Sacramentary


 * Stole


 * Surplice


 * Thurible / Incensor

Gallery
If you are interested in creating an altar boy manual for your parish or getting a general idea of procedures that can be used during the Mass, please consider looking at the Template Parish Training Manual for Altar Boys